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Sunday 10 July 2011

Love Online by Ravi Aggarwal (CHAPTER 4)

Chapter 4:
Misunderstanding
Sitting on my couch thought for a while why I fall for her? .Why the god made a beautiful and innocent girl like sheena? and why my life getting so complicated?.
Shweta will going to call me in 20 minutes and I was still confused to take which alternative so I went to my room so that no one can listen what I will going to talk to shweta it was like I went to my room like a rat who just take a bit of cheese and run towards its hole but here the mobile phone is more needed then the  cheese.I also took some juice before talking to shweta because I know… I need more energy than the Hercules to face this girl now.


Tring Tring Tring!!! The mobile phone starts ringing and was more sounding like an emergency alarm to me. The small insensitive screen was showing the name of shweta.I hadn't think which alternative I have to choose till now but this time I can’t ignore her call so I make up my mind to attend her call…and gave a quick thought to alternatives and selected one.



I hit the green button and said “hello”…a reply came over from shweta “hi rohit!!..how are you?”….this salutation of her was sounding like a person has to be hanged in a minute and the jailor asking about his health that he is perfectly fine to be hanged or not..I replied “I am fine shweta”…it was really rude of me that I didn’t asked about her health but you know I was not in my senses…the air conditioner showing the 18 degree Celsius temperature but I was sweating like am doing  gym constantly for an hour…she quickly noticed that I didn’t asked about her health so she continued “rohit I was missing you a lot”….missing is sounding like mixing…to me…I was totally mixed and smashed…I replied “well shweta”….I want to say something…she replied “yeah I know…don’t say anything”…..I said “huh!! How you know?”….she replied “I know you love me a lot…I always see in your eyes that how much you love me”….I thought I need a eye doctor….very urgently how come my eyes showing all the stuff… I replied “Hey wait!! Wait!! Wait!! that was not that type of love.. you are my friend’s sister so the love is like that of the friend’s sister”…I think the love definition differs for her as per mine over here…as my theory is “love is like a liquid…no perfect shape, no perfect size….but then also all the molecules are bonded to each other and take the shape of the container….right likewise love also take the shape of the heart where it is being kept”…..she replied “what you want to say”…I make up my mind to get hanged till death so I replied “I AM SORRY SHWETA!! I DON’T LOVE YOU”….



That means I chose Alternative Number 2nd…I don’t know but I love sheena…It was really difficult for me to love someone else…sheena loves me or not…but I love her a lot…she might have not kept my heart with her….but my broken pieces of heart can only be fixed by her…sheena is my dreamgirl….so I thought it is better that I can see my dream girl in reality for always…now I can feel what devdas had felt and I can feel his love for paaro was also pure…I always laughed that how come a guy can love some girl like this that he might gave his life for her…but this love is like a drug…you always want to get intoxicated… oh sheena!! I love you so much and I want to grow old with you”



As I was swimming in these deep thoughts shweta was there at the other end too and she gave a pause to our conversation after listening  my words….she started again “I don’t believe you…come on don’t be scared from my brother”…I thought she started annoying me….and yes I afraid from his brother…but how come she judged me…but as I was a boy….i replied her “hey I don’t afraid of your brother…is only that ‘I don’t love you’…..she shoot me back “why don’t you love me?”…I replied “ just like that”…she asked again “just like that…what do you mean by that huh!!!”….that means “I don’t carry the same feeling like I carry for sheena”….i did a mistake just by mistake I spelled out sheena name…she was in my heart and in my mind every moment….and love always coordinate with heart and heart is of sheena…so this is my FIRST MISTAKE…



She replied “Who is sheena????....you never told about her”….she said like we were best friends from early days and I discuss each and every thing with her like of langotia yaars I replied “well now I am telling you about her so please leave me alone I love her a lot and I can’t love someone else”…..Is she is your girlfriend?...she asked about sheena again….


Well if I reply her that she is not my girlfriend she might have started again so I think to be at the safe side…I tell a lie “yeah!! She is my girlfriend”…this was my SECOND MISTAKE..she exclaimed “oh!!”… “oh!!” was not sounding too natural here from her side…as she artificially feel pity for herself..I thought she can be befooled easily but it was not so easy…the Sudoku between us continued….she replied “how come your status read single?”….I replied “just like that”…she replied “everything can’t be just like that you lying to me”….the girl mind growth was awesome she is acting like a shrewd contriver….”…but now I want to get rid of her so I replied to her “all right shweta I will going to change my status alright”…you can see my status within an hour…just I want to say you are really a nice girl and you will find someone good as you are…and of your age…”…she rudely replied me “you don’t have to bother all this for me”….i replied her “I am sorry shweta”…she replied “Its okie and bye…and I will definitely see your status in an hour”….and she hung up…the last words was bit sounding like a warning to me…



THE THIRD MISTAKE was in my way now I just run towards my laptop…open the flap…open the facebook…change the status…and turn it into “In a relationship”…I want to add the “Complicated word to it”….but for the time being this was fine….this was the last mistake for the day….and the big mistake….I was relaxed that I get rid of her…but was feeling bad that I let someone down…as I myself feeling the same way…


Now sheena told me that she will going to call me at 8 pm…I start waiting for her call now…it was near about 7pm in my clock….so still one hour is left for the launch…


I had my lunch as I don’t know for how much time conversation will last between us…I know she will be happy that I agree for her friendship….but this time I was also happy because I can actually feel that how much I love her more after talking to shweta…so with the same thought as of her superhero shahrukh said  that “kahani abhi baaki hai mere dost” so let the story move on….after having my lunch…I went back to my hole that is my room…with the most compatible device to talk in short  ‘mobile’ J  


I straight away lie on the bed and open my lappy and start playing some of my romantic songs like “te amo” , “I am in love” etc etc….and start thinking about sheena and keep my eyes intact to the desktop clock and start waiting for 8 pm…
Tick tock tick tock…..it’s  8 pm….no calls till now….I was wondering what dream girl was doing right now may be she is taking dinner or maybe she didn’t get back from her gym I start playing a  game with my thoughts that may be my dreamgirl is little bit busy….



Its 9’o clock….and still I am waiting for her to call….the call was expected because her voice yesterday was telling me how much she need a answer from my side…but she didn’t called me…my situation became same as of my first meet with her…I was thinking why the girl is doing the same with me everytime…its 9:30 pm and still sheena didn’t called me up…I might thought to call her…but you know a boy…its ego and its self respect…I thought for while that let me keep my ego and respect aside but what happened with me at the first meet I don’t want to repeat it again…a forceful love is not more than the punishment of imprison…I thought I  should do something else to take my attention off to sheena…
So I open facebook…there were 40 notifications…I got surprised as I never got more then 9 to 12 notification in a day…I just click on the notification button….and saw what this all about…all the notifications is of ‘liked’ my changed relationship status…all friends had congratulated me for getting me ‘in a relationship’…this fake status made me a lover boy without a girl…I was hating shweta for doing this….but to get rid of her this is the only way…I also replied my friends as “thanks to all”…thanks is sounding like...thanking sir after his lecture…people was asking about the name of my dreamgirl…but I was not so lucky that I can reveal the name so I avoided the name by writing…  “it’s a secret :P”



The clock struck 11 pm now….I was feeling so low…like I was fasting for around 10 days….feeling so weak…my expectations now getting weak too…I cursed myself that why I become her victim once again…



Sheena can’t do this to me…I was getting worried about her now that if she is fine or not…some more thoughts were like this- if sheena’s mobile is working fine?…if sheena never loved me?…if sheena is insane and all the things happened yesterday was just a drama?…if she just want to play my feelings all the time?…if she really deserve my love my care for her?….all the thoughts were creating a buzz in my mind and sucking my energy at highest level…



The clock struck 1am now…and this whole thing made me more restless….now I decided to make her call now because I was not worried about my respect but now I was more worried about  sheena…that if everything is alright at her end or not…
I know sheena sleeps around 2 am as we chat all night previously till 2 am so this time I didn’t gave a second thought…and dialled her number right away…
Tring Tring!!! Tring Tring!!!....it was ringing and ringing again and again…but no answer…I called her again….the same happened for the second time too. She didn’t answered my call…I did the same for the third time…this time she picked my call..I said “sheena!! hey sheena are you there?”…she replied “yeah rohit…what happened?”…she was firm and not looking weak or low.. her voice was firm…I replied “is everything fine at your end sheena?”…she replied instantly “yeah everything is fine here”…it was so rude from her side all the things happened at the Connaught place…was now reeling in front of my eyes like a flashback…but I was eager to find the reason so I asked “why you are doing this to me sheena?…why you didn’t called me up!? when you were absolutely fine…”….she replied “just like that”…..now I can feel what shweta must have felt some time ago…when I used this word for her…I asked her back “what you mean by that?”….she replied rudely “nothing rohit?...what you want now!!?”…..these words of her was killing me…I was confused what made her to say all this…I asked her softly “hey princess what happened…did you forgot all the talks we had yesterday”…she replied “well they don’t carry any meaning now”….



I said to her “sheena you can’t be so rude …I don’t believe that you can say all this I always trusted you more than myself…I love you blindly you know this…I think there is a problem…something bothering you come on say…what happened?”….she replied “nothing”….she was acting like a child now I know she has something in her mind but she was not ready to speak…but yeah this time I don’t let her go…and just left me so alone or my life will become like a burning cigarette….and my feelings will become like its smoke….so this time I really need an answer for doing this to me.



I started again “come on sheena-tell me what happened?”….she took a pause for a while and then replied “rohit…I want to say something…?”…i replied “am listening”  ….she continued “rohit…I loved you always when we chat through facebook…and I told you the reason about our separation...the parents and my guiltiness”….i thought it was the same reason but why this happening again…I thought it was over on that day only….I replied “if parents is a problem here once again baby?”…..she said “no no no”…she stammered a bit…the thing is that I feel that you never loved me”



“WHAT???????.....”……. “what the fuck”…..this was making me crazy- my mouth got wide open and my eye balls were looking as if they may pop out any second….the girl I loved, in my only life was saying all this to me….I was confused…and more puzzled what made her to say that….”
I ask her “why you are saying all this sheena?”….sheena replied “I loved you rohit…it’s not only you who feel the pain..I also feel some pain”….”don’t think I am a heartless and insane girl….but I have some priorities and I always want someone to feel like I feel….after our first meet I thought… I did a blunderous mistake….and hurt you like a hell”…I was not In a really good state of mind but the thing you did today…clear me out everything about your character and you played with my feelings”



Tears started rolling from my eyes….I was crying now…. “sheena..what made you to say all this….what happened dear…if I did any mistake…”..she replied “no it was not your mistake…well I must have not said all this to you when I always wanted to be friends with you…I am sorry”….i replied “be specific sheena….the game is over…please speak up….”



Sheena continued “I went to facebook today….”….she was giving me a hint “but I was crying and her words were ringing in my mind so I didn’t catch up her words”….i replied “then?”….she took pause and said “YOU GOT IN A RELATIONSHIP”….. “CONGRATULATIONS”…after saying this she started crying and continued “I know ,you are free to have any girl but the incident between us happened just a one day back and you got into relationship..so quickly….



Oooooooooooohhhh…..all the things was getting clear in my mind now this all happened due to mistakes I done today…because of that shweta….she was pointing my status….and I replied to her “is this online html page is more then to my voice sheena?....if you can’t feel the pain in my voice sheena”….
Sheena replied “yeah!! But….”…she was getting confused….”oh sheena!!  I am really very sorry but something weird happened with me”….she asked  “what weird”…. Well I have to explain now all the things to her or either I going to lose her….



I tell her what happened with me after I was coming back after the meet…what happened with me at the metro station….what happened one day before…and about my conversation with shweta….



I know sheena trust me…she knows- I never hide anything from her…..and yeah she believed what I told about shweta….you see believing a guy met online...was not easy...and she took six months to believe so the trust I created in her heart is more stronger then the wall of china…but I can say the love she created in my heart is more stronger than titanium…


She listen to each and every word I tell about shweta…she was quiet and listening like a sweet obedient little child….she then try to speak but was speechless after knowing all this….


After taking much time she started “rohit,but this is not the way of getting rid of anyone…”…this time her voice is sounding the same like of RASOGULLA….and I fall for her once again….but this time I want to rise as my love falls every time… and need a good support…I control myself as I was getting lost in her voice…and I want to say “I love you” once again…hmmm…so I replied to her “well I don’t have any choice, I never loved shweta..and she was not trusting me”....i know she was smiling a bit after listening to these words….I know because I can feel her from here only….she asked me innocently again…and the question she asked was very touchy…and I started loving her more and more…she asked “do you really left shweta because you don’t love her or because of his brother?”…her question told me…what she want to hear…this time I smile a bit.. I tell her “yeah sweetheart….I don’t love her and you know whom do I love most”…..she smiled more and I know she was blushing too…and when she blushes her eyes get down and her cheeks get red like of kashmiri apples…I want to see them now…and want to see them rest of the life…..I wanted to kiss that apples…want to feel her fragrance…


She continued “I am sorry rohit…for misjudging you”….i replied “no honey,I am sorry..it was my mistake any girl in your place would act like this”….she said “any girl”….i replied “no there is only one girl…and you know the name.”…she blushed once again… she said “well rohit,I was thinking the same that I trusted you after judging you and know you so much,how come you just dramatically changed and I thought you cheated me”….I was listening it quietly and what happened with me earlier was get washed away with every line of my dreamgirl…I was happy after listening what she feel for me…I was cursing myself to criticize this girl…I replied “so…what you think?”….she said “you are a true lover…that I feel…”



I replied “if my true love don’t deserve you?”…….my question was straight forward…and I was expecting her ‘yes’ now….she took a pause around 1 minute…she try to escape this time and want to change the topic…she said “so rohit what you think…?...about our friendship”….she just put my meter down…after asking this question…but I don’t want to be punished like this….I repeat “if my true love don’t deserve you?”…..she replied “rohit I told everything yesterday about it”….i said “sheena I can do anything for you…tell me all your conditions I am ready for every condition…I just want you”….sheena replied “I can’t help it rohit…..i loved you but now…”…I replied “but now what you don’t love me now tell me”….she replied “I don’t know”…..i asked her again “come on sheena tell me….say you don’t love me and I will be your friend forever”….she replied “I don’t know,please don’t do this to me…”




I continued “just tell me one thing….what made you to not to receive my calls today”…..after listening to this question she was getting short of words…she repeated again “I don’t know”…..I asked her once again “what made you to feel that I cheated you…when you just want a friendship”….she replied “I don’t know”….i started again “why you want to know that I love shweta or not”….she replied at very low voice now “I don’t know”…I screamed now…surely…my mom going to listen me if she was still awaked “what you know sheena tell me this”….now I can feel her pain…I was not liking this but…. This was my last chance to make her feel what she was trying to hide…she replied “I don’t know,I don’t know,I don’t know…..”…and she started crying…..and here come my weakness….but I control myself and become hard….she stopped crying after 3 minutes. …she asked “what you want from me rohit”



I replied “LOVE”….thats all I need…. I know you love me…I don’t know why you are denying the fact but trust me…your all conditions will be my command…you know me sheena…then why you are denying that you still love me”….she replied I know rohit but this was not because of you but because of me”…..I asked “what happen now”…she replied “I told you about what I feel about my parents and all”…I try to convince her “do you think I am not your right choice? Just tell me this”….she replied “I think you can be only one to whom I loved and I know ,you can’t be wrong”….. “then why are you thinking all this….your parents will respect her daughter’s decision and one day. Just give me some time to prove myself then when the time will right we both going to tell all this to them”..it was looking…quite convincing from my side…but I don’t know what was in her mind…she was not saying anything…but it was looking like she was in a deep thought for a while…now I was waiting to listen the magical “yes” from her side…



But you know she also know the same trick…I played on her…sheena was too beauty with brains type…or maybe she was confused… “okie rohit…wait for the answer I want some time to think…as this time I don’t want to hurt you what I did at the meet”….well she was right…I also don’t want to have the same scene…once again….



I said “okie fine…when you will tell me the answer…?” she replied “tomorrow at the same time”…..and I think one hard day for me…but I think…anything for my love… I said “okie sheena,I will wait for your answer….but think thrice after giving the answer because your answer…will decide our relation for future..your answer will decide…my fate…your answer will decide our life sheena”…..she said “yeah.. I know…rohit”..her voice getting low and low….i said “hey sheena,you need sleep now….you sleep sweetheart….and think all this tomorrow”…she said “hmmm”….i wished her good night…and yeah GOOD NIGHT…and this time I mean it J…and we hung up the call…


The clock was also getting tired…and moon was still poking  from my window…like saying…come on kids sleep now…one more hard day for two online lovers….
I lie on my bed…and first time… I was thanking shweta for doing all this to me because of her effort this all happened…that i got it know…that sheena still carry a soft corner for me…and she still carry love for me….and was praying to god that this time…do help me and help her to say “yes”…

And promised god that I will worship with 101rs Prasad…you know now days god also want some bribe…and I don’t want to take any chance this time…. J

To Be Continued.....
a)What happen next?
b)will sheena say yes to him?
c)if rohit will be her friend?
d)if sheena still love him?
Don’t forget to read my next chapter…..may be my next chapter is last for both online lovers….
Your lovely feedback always inspire me to write more and more….if you have any query or anything you can directly talk to me through facebook by the help of facebook badge….at my blog..or leave your comment…..
Thanks once again….


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